Jun 22, 2021

Divorce & Conflict

Jun 22, 2021 - Resources by |

It can seem like conflict and divorce go hand in hand; after all if there was no conflict in the marriage, they wouldn’t be getting divorced right?  However, the conflicts that may have led to the decision to get a divorce do not have to paint the entire divorce process.

The reality is, you can make your divorce more cost-effective and efficient by working with your spouse to avoid conflict.  Once it’s determined that the marriage is over, it’s time to focus on resolving the key issues to get the divorce finalized.  Reliving old arguments and over valuing items from around your home is only going to make things more difficult and expensive.

Maryland Family Law & No Fault Divorce

The divorce laws in Maryland can be confusing; while there are grounds for a “fault” divorce in Maryland it typically is more trouble than it’s worth.  In most divorces, there is no clear benefit to establishing fault so it’s better to agree on key items and work towards a no fault divorce.

Issues to Resolve in a Divorce

There are a few key issues to resolve in any divorce:

  • Asset Division – Determining Marital Property vs. Non-Marital Property
  • On-going financial commitments (child support, alimony or spousal support)
  • Shared custody of minor children

The above issues are the only issues the judge assigned to your case will be interested in.  They will not be interested in helping you resolve arguments.  Generally speaking, the judges will approve most agreements that the spouses are able to work out.  Going into court and asking them to resolve the issues for you is more expensive, gives you less control and is much more time-consuming.

Conflict in a Divorce – a Very Expensive Argument

The issues that need to be addressed in a divorce are again, asset division, financial commitments and the arrangements for shared custody.  The more that you and your spouse can agree upon, the more efficient and cost-effective your divorce process will be.  Hiring lawyers for hundreds of dollars an hour to argue over items is not a good use of resources.  Focusing on what’s important and trying to agree on as much as possible is what will give you the most control over the process.

Mediation & Low-Conflict Divorce

Mediation and other forms of alternative dispute resolution have been gaining in popularity in Maryland and around the U.S.  This allows the divorcing spouses to take more control and work towards resolving the key items to get their divorce finalized.  Low-Conflict Divovce does NOT mean that one party will “win” and one will be treated unfairly.  It means that both spouses are dedicated to the idea of resolving the custody and financial issues in a reasonable fashion that is in accordance with Maryland family law.

Conflict in a Divorce & Children

Not only is a high-conflict divorce expensive, emotionally taxing and time consuming, there have been many studies all concluding basically the same thing; conflict in a divorce is very hard on the children involved.  Whether the children are actively being used to communicate / argue between spouses or are simply aware that they are a part of the conflict it can have a dramatic and lasting effect on everyone involved.

Further Reading

For more information about conflict in divorce and the effect it has on the children of divorce, see these articles: