If you’ve made the decision to divorce and you and your spouse are generally in agreement about the overall structure of your divorce, divorce mediation may be the appropriate vehicle to help you get to an agreement without the cost and emotion of a trial. 

In Maryland, divorce mediation is an alternative dispute resolution process favored by the courts. A divorce mediator is often, but need not be, a divorce attorney who understands the legal process involved in family law. A divorce mediator does not represent either side but acts as a neutral third party who objectively helps the parties negotiate their positions so that a fair and equitable result can be achieved. 

An effective Bethesda divorce mediation attorney is able and qualified to engage in the following:

• Help the parties structure the discussions
• Identify the particular factual issues that must be resolved and included in the divorce mediation settlement
• Explain the legal issues involved
• Identify each party’s concerns
• Find areas of mutual agreement
• Seek concessions in areas of disagreement

It’s important to note that a divorce mediator is not working for either party but rather seeking to reach a consensus. For divorcing couples who are in a contentious situation, a divorce mediator may not be the right solution. 

Critical Issues to Include in a Settlement Agreement

If you do opt for divorce mediation, below are the critical elements that should be included in your divorce mediation settlement agreement.

Child Custody – If you have minor children, child custody arrangements are a keystone of your divorce mediation settlement agreement. In Maryland, there are two types of custody: legal custody and physical custody. Legal custody means the right to care for and make major decisions concerning the child’s care. The parent with custody is empowered to make decisions about a child’s religious upbringing, schooling, healthcare, and similar important decisions. Physical custody encompasses where the child lives and how much time the child will spend with each parent. Custody can be shared.

Child Support – Another crucial provision of your divorce mediation settlement agreement is child support. Both parents have a legal duty to support their children, even if they are no longer married. Child support is financial support paid by the non-custodial parent to the custodial parent. Maryland’s Child Support Guidelines are used to establish the amount of child support required. 

Spousal Support – Spousal support, also known as alimony, is not always required in Maryland. Factors the court would evaluate include the length of the marriage and the parties’ standard of living during the marriage. If you and your spouse would like to agree to some level of spousal support, it’s critical to include the amount and conditions on spousal support in the divorce mediation settlement agreement. 

Property Division – If you and your spouse own real estate, cars, jewelry, antique rugs, and other assets, the agreed-upon property divisions should be included in the divorce settlement agreement. There’s a great deal of flexibility in working with the divorce mediator to divide your joint property. You might each take ownership of certain property. Or you may decide to sell certain property and split the proceeds. It may be necessary to set deadlines for certain things. For example, if you’re going to be selling your jointly-owned home, you may want to set a deadline and provide a contingency if the house does not sell by that date. 

Financial Settlements – It’s rare for a divorcing couple not to have some joint finances. You’ll need to inventory your checking accounts, savings accounts, pensions, stock accounts, and retirement accounts, and figure out how to divide them. Similarly, you’ll have to calculate your debts from loans and credit cards and figure out who will be responsible for their repayment.

Business Settlements – Many couples start a business together, which adds extra complexity to divorce mediation. A good divorce mediator can help you navigate this situation. One option is to continue running the business together. Obviously, this option works best if the spouses can maintain an amiable relationship. Other possibilities include having one spouse buy out the other and run the business individually, or liquidating the business entirely with an agreed-upon split of the sale proceeds.

Getting Ready For Divorce Mediation

So, you’ve agreed to divorce mediation and selected a divorce mediator that you both agree on. What’s next? Getting ready for your divorce mediation requires some organization in order to make the process as efficient as possible. First, gather all pertinent paperwork for each issue you will discuss with the mediator. For example, if your divorce mediation session is going to focus on child custody issues, make sure that you have the schedule of your child’s classes and activities. It’s also important to think about your areas of compromise. 

It can be helpful to view your divorce mediation sessions as business meetings. Be prepared by gathering and reviewing all pertinent documents so you can discuss them and your preferences thoughtfully. 

Being emotionally prepared for the divorce mediation is imperative. You will be discussing tough and emotional topics, and if you haven’t processed your emotions in a healthy way, the discussions will be less fruitful than if you are emotionally prepared. 

And while it’s important to enter into a divorce mediation with an open mind, it’s also important to set goals. For example, it may be important to you for your children to stay in their current home. Or it may be important to continue operating a business with your ex-spouse since you feel you’ve invested a lot of heart and soul into it. 

Contact The Law Offices of Brandon Bernstein, LLC

Here at the Law Offices of Brandon Bernstein, we have many years of experience in a wide variety of family law issues. We have a particular specialty in divorce mediation, and have the skills to help a divorcing couple find common ground on all the issues that must be included in a divorce settlement agreement. Contact us today for a free consultation,