Communication Problems, Comparisons & Tempting Apps Among Culprits
How many times a day do you check your phone? Whether you’re sending a text message, replying to or reading through emails, scrolling through apps or just zoning out with one distraction or another, we all spend way more time on your phones each and every day than we’re likely proud of or ready to admit. One symptom of this is a potential negative effect on your relationship and marriage. For instance, one recent study found that 70% of married women reported smartphones interfering with the relationship at least some of the time.
There are numerous factors to take into account here. For one thing, if you’re always on your phone, you’re more likely to be distracted, and not paying attention to the person you’re physically spending time with. This negatively impacts communication while inhibiting an overall positive interaction with the other person.
Another issue at hand is that when we’re on social media, we tend to compare ourselves to what we’re seeing other people do. However, we typically fail to account that we’re seeing the curated highlights of somebody else’s life, and not their day to day routines. In comparing their made for social media highlights to your more typical everyday life, it’s easy to feel unsettled or dissatisfied whether professionally, personally, romantically, or all of the above.
Further, there’s a whole world of temptation hidden away on your phone. From apps such as Tinder and Bumble where you can connect with single people in your area, to your ability to follow models or celebrities on Instagram or Twitter, to quick access to pornography, it’s all right there on your phone. Just because it’s there doesn’t make it a problem, but the convenience of access to all of the above elevates the risk of temptation and the allure of what else is out there, along with disinterest at home.
When it comes to divorce, the digital trail one partner leaves behind on his or her cell phone is also a common form of evidence. Whether it is indeed an app such as Tinder, or it’s strings of text messages, photographs of another person, or whatever the case may be, the private life you live on your smartphone is likely less private than you believe.
All this to say that smartphones are indeed a common problem in marriages. If that’s something you’ve experienced, you’re not the only one. As we all live increasingly digital lives, this is a problem that’s likely to only increase in prevalence as well.